It's been a while

     A week after Thanksgiving our world was rocked!!!!  Something happened (sorry I can't say right now what) that led to several days of ups and downs and lots, lots, lots of prayer.  I was told by our home study agency that we shouldn't adopt right now that it wouldn't be a good idea....I cried, a lot! I have wanted to adopt for as long as I can remember, I thought this was what God wanted for us, what he commands us (James 1:27- though I know it doesn't mean that everyone has to adopt). In my mind it was supposed to be this way: start the process in late October 2012, get everything done as quickly and thoroughly as possible and based on the "average" timeline from our agency we would have our 2 children in the fall of 2013 but perhaps that was just that MY timeline not HIS timeline.  I was distraught :-(
     Once I got myself together and spent some time in prayer I called our adoption agency.  I was so thankful when I heard Aliesa's voice telling me everything was going to be fine, that we could keep going.  The answer I wanted to hear but was it what we were supposed to do?  Are we supposed to keep going, should we slow down, should we start again later?? We prayed (and are still praying) but we feel this is what God wants for our family and though I may not be holding my sweet African babies in early fall 2013 but hopefully in early 2014 (or whatever God's timeline is) we will.
     I am reminded more and more each day that I have to surrender my will to God.  His plan is always better than mine yet still I hold on...why?  Why can't I let go and keep an open hand?  Why do I always close back up and hold tight to what I want?  My prayer through this (and in all aspects of life) is that I learn to keep an open hand, heart, and mind.  God knows what He is doing and I need to surrender ALL. 

This song, "Waiting Room" by Jonny Diaz is a great reminder....
    Here in this waiting room yearning for You to say go
    And though I’m convinced that a yes would be best
    This time You’re telling me no

    It’s not that I don’t have an answer
    It’s just not the one that I’d like
    But through this time Lord I must keep in mind
    You’re always wiser than I

    You have a much better purpose
    And You have a far greater plan
    And You have a bigger perspective
    Cause You hold this world in your hands

    The things that I seek are from You
     Like the strong healing touch of your hand
     But when You say no help me trust even though
    There’s a reason I can’t understand

    When that miracle comes cause Your answer is yes
    I will praise you for all of my days
    But when Your wisdom declares that a no is best
    I will praise You just the same



Praying for our journey to be done the way He wants and in His time.....Lord grant us the wisdom and discernment we need to live in Your will.

Plugging along on the paperwork :)

 The adoption process is funny because its definitely a hurry up and wait process.  Paul and I have the philosophy that when the ball is in our court we are going to work diligently to get our things done so we can turn it in and wait for the next step.  We set goals for ourselves and make time to get our things done.  So as of right now we are in the waiting stage, we have sent off all the paperwork we have and scheduled our first home study meeting.  So as we wait we are looking at fundraiser ideas, praying for our new kid(s) and for help to trust in God's timing :) 

Emma is a champ!

We traveled to visit my parents for the Thanksgiving holiday.  This was Emma's first road trip and we set really low expectations.  We decided to give EmG her normal night time bottle then put her in the car seat and see how it went.  Never did we think the first reason we would stop would be to stop for gas but to our shock after being in the car for 5 1/2 hours we stopped for gas and she continued to sleep.  At about the 7 hour mark (3am) she started to wake up, I climbed in the backseat, gave her some bottle, and she was back out.  After 9 hours and 1 minute we pulled into my parents driveway about 5am, we have never been able to make that trip so quickly.  As soon as we got here, we prayed and thanked the Lord for the amazing trip.  I am currently trying to adjust my expectations back to low because I am really not sure if we will get that lucky when we try to drive back home. 

So thankful for our family, parents, safe travels, new experiences, and future kiddos :)

I am a little late in starting this but better late than never :)  I want to have a place to look back and remember our journey to adding to our family! 

I, Jess, have always wanted to adopt internationally.  I have loved Africa since the teenage years and after traveling there 3 times I truly fell in love.  Thankfully my husband is a supporter of my passion :)  We traveled to Africa together in 2011 and I think he knew at that time just how strong my love for this continent and people was. 
Fast forward to June 2012, we had our baby girl-Emma!  She is an absolute joy and blessing.  Paul and I immediately fell in love and had an even deeper understanding of God's love for us.  Holding her and feeling overwhelmed  by our love for her made it even more meaningful that God would send his only son to die for me....mind blowing!!!  In August, we began discussing (and doing lots of praying about) adoption for our family. We began to talk with friends who had adopted and looking into agencies.  After a few information sessions and a talks with friends we decided on an organization in Indiana that does adoptions in Africa.  We couldn't be more excited for this journey :)

October 29th:  Submitted our application
October 30th:  Approved!!!
November 1st: Sent in our adoption agreement and payment schedule
November 7th:  Became official clients :)